Children & Adolescents Clinic

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Clinical Reference Systems: Pediatric Advisor 10.0

Eating Basics: Helping Your Child Eat Well

Good eating gives children the nutrition they need. You do not, though, have to force children to eat certain foods or control the amount they eat. As they grow up, children will gradually learn to like a variety of food. They also know how much they need to eat. Their feelings of hunger and fullness help them eat the right amount of food they need to grow.

Feeding children demands a division of responsibility:

  • You decide what, when, and where to eat.
  • Your child decides how much and whether to eat.

YOUR RESPONSIBILITIES

  1. You select the food.

    You decide what food goes on the table. Of course, you will pay attention to what your children do and don't like but you don't have to be enslaved by their food preferences.

    You know more about food and eating than your children do. They need to learn from you. It's a mistake to limit the menu to foods your child will easily accept.

See A Healthy Diet

  1. You decide the best time for meals and snacks.

    You decide when to offer meals and snacks. Children need regularly scheduled meals. They also need snacks at times that allow them to come to their regular meals hungry but not starving. Their stomachs are small and their energy needs are high. They can't make it from one meal to the next without eating something in between.

    Don't give your children food whenever they ask for it. You must remain in charge of the menu and the timing of meals and snacks. If children fill up, even on nutritious foods and beverages, they won't be hungry at mealtime and they won't learn to eat a variety of food.

See Meals for Children

Snacks for Children

  1. You decide where your children should eat.

    When children eat only at the table they learn to take eating seriously. Children shouldn't run with food. It's not safe because they might choke. It also makes a mess. If children eat only at the table you are less likely to give food handouts to ease their hurt feelings and general crankiness.

  2. It's up to you to make meals friendly.

    Studies show children eat best if someone they trust eats with them. That grownup should be friendly and not nag them about their eating. Keep thrilling distractions and riotous laughter down. Children can forget to eat or can choke.

YOUR CHILDREN'S RESPONSIBILITIES

  1. Children will learn to like a variety of foods.

    When your child sees you eating an unfamiliar food, he assumes that some day he will eat it, too. One day he might taste the food, then remove the bite from his mouth. He is not rejecting it. He is just getting used to it. Research tells us children taste and remove unfamiliar food for 10 or 15 meals before they swallow it. Then they like it and will eat it -- some of the time.

  2. Children change their minds about the foods they will eat.

    Children may love a food, then not eat it for months. Or they may eat it some days but not others. They may eat an enormous breakfast and snack, then very little the rest of the day. They may eat only one or two food items at a meal.

    Children are erratic eaters because they are very sensitive to their hunger and appetite. They will even stop in the middle of a bowl of ice cream if they get full.

  3. Children know how much they need to eat.

    Every child grows differently and every child needs a different amount of food. Some days children are hungry and some days they aren't. Some days they are active and some days they aren't. You have to trust that they know how much they need to eat.

    You can tell that your child knows how much to eat by the way she grows. If your child's growth shows a consistent pattern and you are offering her a variety of nutritious food in a friendly fashion, she is doing fine.

See Normal Growth.

Do your job, let your children do theirs, and they will eat well.

CALL YOUR CHILD'S PHYSICIAN DURING OFFICE HOURS IF:

  • Your child consistently eats poorly.
  • You and your child get into struggles about eating.

Written by Ellyn Satter, R.D., M.S.S.W., author of "How to Get Your Kid to Eat...But Not Too Much," Bull Publishing, Palo Alto, CA.
Copyright 1999 Clinical Reference Systems