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Clinical Reference Systems: Pediatric Advisor 10.0
Threats or Hurtful Comments
DESCRIPTION
When young children are angry, they scream or throw a
tantrum. As they become older, they say hurtful things like
"I hate you" when they are upset. Do children try to play
psychological games on their parents? Yes, of course.
RESPONDING TO HURTFUL COMMENTS OR THREATS
Respect your child's needs to express angry feelings. Don't
Take your child's exaggerated comments personally. For
example, if your child says something hurtful when she is
given a time-out, you can reply, "Well, I love you anyway,
but you still need to take a time-out." Don't allow her
comment to change the rule on time-outs.
At a later time, discuss anger with your child. Explain how
people who live together normally have both positive and
negative feelings about each other. You can add, "Sometimes
I get angry with you, but I always care about you."
If your youngster threatens to run away, say calmly: "That
would make me very sad." Most children then drop the
subject. However, an adolescent who threatens to run away
needs to be taken more seriously. Often family counseling
is needed.
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