Clinical Reference Systems: Pediatric Advisor 10.0
Physical Fighting and Spitting
CHILDREN PHYSICALLY FIGHTING WITH EACH OTHER
- Definition
Two children are angry with each other and hitting,
kicking, or shoving. This is not wrestling. In
wrestling, children are not angry with each other but
are practicing their physical skills. Wrestling is fine
as long as it's done outside or in a recreation room and
the opponents are reasonably well-matched.
- The rule
"Don't fight with each other, because disagreements
can't be settled by hitting."
While you can have a rule against fighting in your home
and yard, you can't control what goes on in the
neighborhood or school. Some parents teach their
children to fight (but fight fair). Another option is
to teach your child to say, "I don't believe in
fighting," and to walk away from aggressors. Although
the chance of being seriously hurt in a fight is slim,
it can happen. Sometimes it's better to be smart than
to be brave. Most disagreements can be settled with
words, and most bullies can be ignored. You don't have
to teach your child physical defense.
- Discipline technique
Intervene at the early shoving stage. Separate the
children without questioning the children. Send both to
time-out in separate rooms or separate corners. Another
option is to send one child outside. When appropriate,
remove the object of conflict, such as use of the TV.
- Praise
Praise your child for playing with other children in a
friendly way and for settling verbal disagreements
themselves.
- Model
Solve problems without hitting or yelling. Spouse abuse
condones physical fighting among children. Also avoid
favoritism, which contributes to sibling fighting.
SPITTING
- The rule
"Don't spit. It doesn't look nice."
- Discipline technique
If your child spits on another person, use immediate
time-out. If your child spits for attention-seeking
purposes, restrict the places where it is permitted
(such as in the toilet, sink, or outdoors). If your
child spits anywhere else, place him or her in time-out.
- Praise
Praise your child for not spitting in situations where
he or she previously spit.
- Model
Don't spit yourself. Take a position against chewing
(smokeless) tobacco.
RELATED TOPICS
Hurting Another Child
Siblings Arguing and Quarreling
|
Written by B.D. Schmitt, M.D., author of "Your Child's Health," Bantam Books.
|
Copyright 1999 Clinical Reference Systems
|
|